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...and how to start the healing process.
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Click to view counselor bioBy Kristy Cobillas, MEd, LPC

"What good does it do to talk about it, if it’s not going to change anything?”

When it comes to trauma, there are those who will attempt to mentally and emotionally bury the experience. It is true that simply talking about the past does not change it. Recounting the memory of a horrendous experience may do little more than cause one to re-experience the emotional pain. In therapy, victims of trauma can process the event(s) with the help of a professional, who uses techniques conducive to the healing process.

Many people who have experienced trauma continue to suffer long after the event is over. The memories may fade over time and sometimes they will seem to disappear altogether; yet, the effects of the trauma may be life-long. Trauma often teaches lessons that embed themselves in each of its victims. For example, through trauma, one may learn to become more cautious and self-protective in the future.  ...READ MORE HERE

Click to view counselor bioBy Kathryn Manley, MS, LPC, CST


Many of our Agape articles embody a theme of embracing our core relationship fears and learning how to tolerate the undesirable emotions that come with them.  In order to move from self-judgment toward self-compassion, it’s important to understand our core fears, their origin, and how they impact our thoughts, feelings and relationships. This means we have to move toward the fear rather than avoid it. Once we acknowledge a relationship fear and move towards it, the fear begins to lose the power that it has over us. Poet Robert Frost has quoted “The only way out is through.” This is so true!

A great resource to understanding core fears is the book or DVD series DNA of Relationships by Dr. Gary Smalley. According to Dr. Smalley, examples of core relationship fears can include the following:  ...READ MORE HERE
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