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Issue 89 - 10th July

At last some good news


Dear Reader,

2020 has been replete with terrible news, and it feels like it just gets worse and worse. Melbourne is now back under lockdown, Hong Kong is essentially over as we know it, and high-waisted trousers continue to be a thing. It's a shocker of a year.

The climate is only getting warmer, the virus is raging out of control across the globe and there has been a sharp rise in authoritarian "strong-man" politics. The UN is reporting that hundreds of millions people have been plunged into poverty as a result of the pandemic and the slow descent into global economic depression means it will be decades before that trend is reversed. And perhaps worst of all, hairy shoes are back in fashion.

So it's great to be able to bring you some good news at last. It's such a welcome relief to have something positive and hopeful to share with you all.

To be honest, I don't know what it is at the moment. But rest assured, there is some good news somewhere in the world. I personally can't think of anything. But, statistically speaking, it must be true that someone, somewhere in the world is having a great time. I'll let you know if I find out any more details about it.

Charles Firth
Managing Editor
The Chaser

P.S. If you haven't already please consider subscribing to the website and support independent fake news. Your generous support allows us to find interesting new writers and performers and helps in the production of videos like our latest one, about the guy who makes all the racist statues. Check it out on Twitter or Facebook.


A few other things...

PODCAST - New episode out today

This week Dom takes a look at the unlikeliest presidential campaign since Trump’s and Charles bans Pauline Hanson from the podcast. Nina Oyama fills in for Andrew and checks out Melbourne’s worst food delivery service, Policearoo, and Rebecca De Unamuno brings us all the news you can’t trust. Stream it online on our website or at Nova or download it in any podcast app, including:






NEW COMEDY ALBUM - OUT NOW

Everyone's been talking about all the essential nurses, doctors, teachers and shop workers that have got us through this difficult period. Here in NSW, we've rewarded the hard work and bravery of nurses, teachers and other servants with a wage cut. Sorry, I mean wage 'freeze'.

But nobody has paid tribute to the non-essential workers, who've been sitting at home, not playing a vital role in sustaining us through this historic period.

That's why, this week, The Chaser launched its first album, and dedicated it to them, the non-essential workers. It's a great album. 

Stream it on Spotify or Apple Music. (Or search for "Radio Chaser".)

Or buy the album from The Chaser Shop today for just $29.95, and we'll send you a special limited-edition, signed copy of the album.


THE CHASER QUARTERLY - 22-page sample online

Even in lockdown, you can still browse a free 22-page sampler of our latest book at ChaserShop.com. The fully revised second edition of The Anti-Expert's Guide to Everything includes a tasteful guide to how to cure coronavirus the natural way, without the pesky use of Western science.
 

NEWS


‘We all need to check our privilege’ says actual prince


NSW reports outbreak of 7.5 million cases of ‘being a smug bastard’


Travellers from Victoria screened to make sure they can shut the fuck up about ‘laneways’ for five minutes


Prince Andrew devastated to discover he bought airline


Contractors guarding Melbourne quarantine hotels organise huge party to say sorry for second wave


Pauline Hanson launches new line of face masks to combat COVID


Channel Nine shocked to learn nation’s most prominent white supremacist might be a bit racist


China to simply buy up Australia’s missiles if we ever make one that works


John Howard releases glowing character reference for Ghislaine Maxwell


Obituary: Ghislaine Maxwell (1961-next week)


Ghislaine Maxwell placed under strict 23 hour surveillance


Royal Family says sorry to Meghan Markle, offers free driving-tour of Paris

The Anti-Expert's Guide to Everything - $24.95
BUY NOW

With the world on the brink of collapse, it's important not to rely on experts just because they "know more" about stuff than you do. This book delves into the key philosophical movement of our time: the move away from expert's and their annoying experty expertise.

  • Did you know that climate change graphs look very different indeed if you turn them upside down?
  • Have you ever noticed the alarming number of celebrities who have been vaccinated and then later died?
  • Did you know that over 99% of people who die in car crashes have eaten sultanas at some point in their life? And yet the government refuses to ban sultanas!

This book is sure to alarm even the most level-headed conspiracy theorist. This book takes on topics that others fear to address for fear of looking like a total idiot.

BUY NOW

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