Drunk Johnny, iAmDLOW, & Check Mate.
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Thursday, December 8, 2016

Quick Hits
  • Ready? OK. Cheerleading and Muay Thai have been granted provisional recognition by the International Olympic Committee. Both sports can apply to be in the Olympic Games in three years, just enough time for all those cheerleaders to be legal.
  • Seems Like A Nice Guy. Just kidding. Video of Oklahoma RB Joe Mixon punching a woman and fracturing her jaw at a coffee shop back in 2014 will soon be made public. Don't worry though, he's playing in the Sugar Bowl on Jan 2. before heading to the NFL Draft - where all criminals truly belong.
  • Tossin' Bottles. Poppin' bottles is no longer cool. Tossin' bottles, now that's cool. Before the slaughtering of the New York Knicks finished, the Cleveland Cavs decided to entertain themselves by trying to land a bottle of water right-side up. Lord, when will this crazy end?
  • Thursday Inspiration. University of Texas' new head coach says we can do anything, but iAmDLOW insists we can't. Who to believe?!
  • Out Cold. Not the movie with Zach Galifianakis, but Vancouver Canucks Philip Larsen. After a massive check by Taylor Hall of the New Jersey Devils Tuesday night, Larsen was left unconscious and taking off the ice via stretcher.

The Main Event
There are other fighters than Conor McGregor and Floyd Mayweather, and thanks to one of them throwing a table at the other, and making it look incredibly easy to do so, we now know two more fighters.

The funny-talking British heavyweight boxers, Dereck Chisora and Dillian Whyte, are scheduled to go head-to-head this Saturday night. The two, who already don't like each other thanks to a glass throwing incident, were initially scheduled to hold separate press conferences due to the bad blood. Thankfully the promoter made sure those not paying to watch the fight got a little taste of the entertainment, and we'd wager that bet paid off mightily.

Of course Whyte is the Vegas favorite to win, Chisora has been wearing himself out with all that table throwing!

Good Sport
Andre The Giant Heart
Now retired football player, Andre Johnson, continued his yearly tradition of being awesome. For the past nine years, Johnson would spend crazy $$$ ensuring Houston-area kids in Child Protective Services receive toys for the holidays. This year, kids had 80-seconds (Johnson's number with the Texans) to grab whatever toys they want. ThisJohnson spent nearly $20,000.

Bad Sport
Johnny Boozball
Despite being the last Cleveland Browns quarterback to lead the team to a win (Week 14 of 2015 season), Johnny Manziel nowhere near in football shape. He spent nearly $35,000 to party hard in Miami for his birthday (which included chugging Fireball at 8AM in the most douchey way possible) before warning Heisman favorite Lamar Jackson not to go to Cleveland. To make matters worse, Cleveland lost in a Madden simulation to the Alabama Crimson Tide.

Good Old Caption
We're taking tomorrow off due to a Good Old Sport emergency...not being as drunk as these kids! We'll be back in your inbox on Monday. Enjoy the weekend, and don't do anything illegal or anyone illegally.

Remember Your Picks
Get your Week 14 NFL picks in for our Good Old Sport Pick 'Em Challenge! Winner gets a koozie and $10 million imaginary dollars. Submissions must be entered by 8:24pm ET TODAY.

Our BOLD PREDICTION of the Week: Giants over Cowboys.
Our LOCK of the Week: Detroit over Chicago.

What to Watch (All Times Eastern)
SOCCER. FC Zorya Luhansk vs. Manchester United - 1pm on FS1; Southampton vs. Hapoel Be'er Sheva - 3pm on FS1
GOLF. Franklin Templeton Shootout - 2pm on GOLF; Hong Kong Open - 9pm on GOLF
NCAA BASKETBALL. Fordham at St. John's - 6:30pm on FS1; Iowa State at Iowa - 8pm on ESPN2; Nicholls State at Florida State - 9pm on ESPNU
NCAA FOOTBALL. College Football Awards - 7pm on ESPN
NBA. Timberwolves at Raptors - 7pm on TNT; Spurs at Bulls - 9:30pm on TNT
NFL. Raiders at Chiefs 8:20pm on NBC
NCAA WOMENS BASKETBALL. Texas A&M at TCU - 8:30pm on FS1
Link of the Day: Grandma is a badass.
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