Sherman & Cousins Are Mean, Pro Bowl Fun?, & Choking The Chicken.
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Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Quick Hits
  • Mean To Media. It turns out, athletes can be dicks. Seattle Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman and Sacramento Kings power forward DeMarcus Cousins both said some very unkind words to members of the press. Sherman went with the classic, "I'll ruin your career," while Cousins took the more roundabout approach, saying "F*cking coward."
  • Don't Drink and Drive. Apparently, Michael Floyd never made it to the end of South Park's alcohol commercial to know the importance of alcohol safety. Footage of the former Arizona Cardinal, now current New England Patriot, being arrested for a DUI has been released.
  • Over & Out. New York Giants head coach Ben McAdoo, the walking definition of a goober, has been fined $50K, while the Giants were fined $150K and will have their fourth-round pick downgraded. The coach used a walkie talkie to radio with goober quarterback Eli Manning during the team's Week 14 win of the Cowboys after the official NFL headsets stopped working.

The Main Event
Yawn... That sound of air coming out of our gaping mouths must mean we're talking about the NFL Pro Bowl.

If you thought watching NFL players half-ass a meaningless football game was fun, then you'll be happy to know it'll happen again this year! The 2017 roster is led by the Oakland Raiders, who represent a league-high seven players, including Derek Carr, Amari Cooper, and Khalil Mack. The Atlanta Falcons are in second (always the bridesmaid) with six players representing the team in Florida, this year's location for the game.

Unlike the previous three years, this game will pit the NFC vs. AFC. However, players will also participate in silly games like dodgeball, relay races, and passing/catching competitions. Hold on to your hats, but we're more excited to watch that, than this. Check out the full Pro Bowl roster here.

Why is this called the 2017 Pro Bowl when this is the 2016 season? This year's Super Bowl champion is considered the 2016 champ, not the 2017 champ. The NFL's structure is about as constantly inconsistent as its pass interference calls.

Good Sport
Sager Strong
Craig Sager, the colorful TNT broadcaster who passed away last week due to a battle with acute myeloid leukemia, was honored at yesterday's memorial service by friend and former TNT colleague Ernie Johnson with a poem (skip head to 3:45 to listen). When you're getting roasted for wearing loud suits and "freezing your willy," even at your memorial service, it's clear you were loved. You'll continue to be missed, Craig.

Bad Sport
A San Diego Chargers security guard really loves his team, and we mean, he really loves them. After choking the chicken on the field mid-game (NSFW) this past week, the security guard has now been fired. Hopefully he got at least one happy ending out of this whole ordeal.

Wet Your Whistle Wednesday
Get in close, because we're going to let you in on one of the most secret drinks we've ever had. It's so secret, that we don't even know what it's called, but that's also because we first tried it during a drunken night exploring Sydney. Since we don't know what it's actually called, we shall dub it: Apple Of My Eye!
As long as you have the right tools, making this drink is so shockingly easy, it should be illegal! Take one green apple and put it in a juicer. Capture that sweet, sweet juice in a shaker. Add one ounce vodka and ice before shaking. Serve to friends, and then just wait for it...

What to Watch
NCAA FOOTBALL. Poinsettia Bowl: BYU vs. Wyoming - 9pm on ESPN
SOCCER. Bayern Munich vs. Leipzig - 2pm on FS1
NCAA BASKETBALL. Elon vs. Duke - 6pm on ESPN2; American at Villanova - 6:30pm on FS1; Kentucky at Louisville - 7pm on ESPN; Illinois vs. Missouri - 7pm on ESPNU; Northern Iowa at North Carolina - 8pm on ESPN2; Southern Illinois (Edwardsville) at Marquette - 8:30pm on FS1; Clemson at South Carolina - 9pm on ESPNU; Virginia at California - ESPN2 at 10pm; Kent State at Oregon State - 11pm on ESPNU
NHL. Capitals at Flyers - 8pm on NBCSN
Link of the Day: Sports are hard.
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