Beer Pong Slam Dunk, LA Fans Throw Punches, & Disappointed!
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Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Quick Hits

The Main Event
Al Jazeera is funking up life for four NFL players.

Pittsburgh Steelers linebacker James Harrison, Green Bay Packers linebackers Clay Matthews and Julius Peppers, and former Packers linebacker Mike Neal were all named in an Al Jazeera documentary that allegedly detailed these NFL players' doping history. This is the same report that claimed Peyton Manning took HGH, but luckily for him, he's retired and DGAFs. The four current NFL players listed above (Mike Neal is a free agent) will need to meet with the NFL before August 25th to discuss the matter, or they'll face to-be-determined disciplinary action.

James Harrison has already been doing some damage control, as he's been sharing an affidavit of his innocence with press looking to get a comment. Although this may be effective, we prefer off-the-cuff Harrison, who's known for saying shit like this; "If that man [Roger Goodell] was on fire and I had to piss to put him out, I wouldn’t do it. I hate him and will never respect him." Ya, that's more like it.

Good Sport
Should Have Shook
Hold on to your hats, because we're about to say something shocking. The International Olympic Committee actually did something good. Islam el-Shehaby, the Egyptian judo fighter who refused to shake his Israeli competitor's hand, has been sent home for displaying conduct "against the spirit of friendship embodied in the Olympic values." Smell ya later, Islam.

Bad Sport
Olympic-sized Dick
British cyclist Mark Cavendish, who was one of the few Tour de France riders to depart to focus on the Olympics, is a dick. During the men's omnium (bicycle track race), Cavendish appeared to have intentionally biked into South Korean rider Park Sang-hoon, causing Sang-hoon to crash and be taken to the hospital on a stretcher. Somehow, Cavendish didn't get docked any points and won silver. Sang-hoon won a hospital bill.

Never Forget
Mini golf champions are still champions.

What to Watch (All Times Eastern)
We've gift-wrapped your Tuesday night.
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