Plenty Woman Weekly
May 29, 2016
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How Dare Anyone Call Amber Heard a Liar?

I lived with domestic violence for years.

I know the shame. I know the responsibility, if you want to call it that, of keeping the secret. It’s this unspoken understanding that it’s nobody else’s business. I didn’t want people to know my life was such a tragic mess. I felt like it was my fault, somehow, that I had gotten myself into it and couldn’t find a way out. I was afraid I would be blamed and, more than anything, I was afraid of what my abuser would do if he found out I told and/or if I tried to leave.

It is for this reason that I am so struck to the core by the reaction of many to Amber Heard’s allegations that Johnny Depp abused her. Johnny Depp’s lawyer is calling her a liar. Two of Johnny Depp’s exes are calling her a liar. Johnny Depp’s daughter is calling her a liar.

On top of all that, countless people on social media who don’t even know Johnny Depp or Amber Heard are calling her a liar, among other horrific names I won’t repeat.

Nobody wants to believe something like this. I get that. Especially about someone like Johnny Depp, who so many people love and respect.

But the truth is, we don’t know. And the public shaming of Amber Heard does nothing but reinforce to women in abusive relationships that there is shame in coming forward with allegations of abuse.

Thankfully, there are plenty of people supporting and defending Amber Heard in the face of all this and making a lot of sense. This tweet from Scottish journalist Vonny Moyer says it best:

“Whatever’s going on, ‘liar’ shouldn’t be the first response to domestic violence claims.”

I hope you’ll join me in learning more about how we can better support women who come forward about domestic violence. Check out the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. You’ll also find them on Facebook and Twitter.

We deserve better,


P.S. I’ve published three new posts to the website since I last wrote. If you haven’t seen them yet, I hope you’ll check them out:

Melting the Ice: Guided Meditation (6 Minutes)
Caffeine & Anxiety: Worth Quitting Coffee Over?
How Do You Escape the Anxiety of a Dangerous Friendship?

As always, feel free to share this email with anyone you'd like. I’d also love to hear your thoughts on anything you’d like to share – in reply to this email, in the comments on the website, or via social media.

Peace and love, ya’ll.

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